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(moved) Christmas under BHO
11/04/08 at 05:41:59
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Here's what a Christmas under BHO would be like...


It was quiet, too quiet. All through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse, when suddenly…The door flew open and in came Obama!!!11one

He tip-toed over to the stick-with-spikes for a tree, and began taking the family's guns so his terrorist friends wouldn't meet any resistance when the time came. When he turned around, his face had a lovely meeting with Mr. Bat.


With a flick of his wrist, Obama brought up his red light saber and slashed the bat into 4 pieces and it fell to the ground, sizzlin.

“GOWD EATIN” belched Barack.

Now, BHO thought, the family must still be home since their bat was loose, which also meant he had struck too early. The family was supposed to be leaving for France. They must’ve heard something because, the next thing he knew was that lights were on and Mrs. McCallister was running down the stairs.

“OH GOOD LORD!” She yelled.

And since the messiah knew every language, he knew she said it in French. So he looked outside and saw the Eiffel Tower.

“Crap…” said B-Hussein-O. He was in “The Secret Bat Cave”…oh wait, wrong movie. He was in France.

(OF COURSE, flying bats always hit people in France…Duh!)

No wonder he felt like running. Good ol France to give you that wimpy feeling of… wait, that's the democrats.

But he was more important than that. He couldn’t run from this peasant now. He pulled out his light saber and yelled his war cry: “ALLAH HU AHKBAR!” and sliced Mrs. McCallister into hamburger patties.

He then left a missile toe under the tree and set the timer for three minutes and went back up the chimney.

Just then, an ugly green guy came in through the window and grabbed the last can of “Who-Hash.”

“Now…to stuff up the tree…”

The Grinch jam packed it into the chimney as an ornament fell off and rolled toward the feet of a little girl.

“Santa…why are you taking our tree?”

“Well…because it’s all broken…now get yer water and go to bed.”

Then the Grinch flew up the chimney as the house exploded.


Barack landed on the roof of the Miller’s, not knowing that Patriots lived here.

“GO!” Two grenades rolled into the star lighted living room and ignited with a loud bang. Josh, Adam, and Frank all burst into the living room.

“Right there, get em, get em!!” Josh screamed as Adam brought up the butt of his shotgun and smashed it into the body of the dark figure in the corner of the room. The figure fell lightly to the floor.

Frank came over, shined his light on him and froze. He scratched his head.

“Good work, check his vital signs.” Ordered Josh.

“Uh sir, it’s a Christmas tree.” replied Frank.

“…Oh…check his tags, too.” Josh said.

“Then the chimney started to make a sound and down came a big ball ‘o gas…I just call him Obama, but whatever.

“WHOA!” said Josh.

Adam threw a frag at Obama, but he ate it. A bright flash came out his oversized mouth.

“Take em out!” yelled Josh.

All 3 men jumped on the big mac and slapped cuffs on him.

“So…you thought you’d get away with taking our guns?” said Josh.

“I already have.” Obama smirked.

“What makes you so sure?” asked Josh holding up his Desert Eagle.

"I signed the Criminal Protection act, which outlawed non-criminal ownership of weapons." replied BO, holding up a document written on with crayons.

"I don't see no document." said Adam, grabbing the paper and crumpling it up."

“Barack, are you okay?” came a crackling sound out of BO's Santa hat.

Instantly, the men had their guns on the hat.

“Move in slowly, boys…and don’t breath.”

The voice came back.

“Barack, hello? It’s cold up here.”

“He must be on the roof.” Frank said.

“Josh didn’t take his eyes off Obama Claus as he said “…Get em.”

Frank and Adam flew upon the roof to find happy sleigh. They also found Michelle up in the pimp sleigh sayin “Where U at?” Two Frag grenades went flyin at the kitty.

Josh became distracted with the boom long enough for BO to body slam him and turn him into a pancake. Barack then ran out the door, making monkey noises.

The Patriot Trio took off after Obomber.

BHO then saw a taxi with a white guy in it and shouted “STOP, TWINKIE!!!” and the cab came to a stop and Obama quickly hopped in.

“HEY, WHERE‘S THE CREAM FILLING?!!?” yelled Obama.

Then the driver slapped him.

"Hey, you're not a driver." said BHO.

"I know, I just enjoy slapping you." replied Bill O'Reilly.

Several bullets hit the side of the car as Barack tried to get out, but took several rounds in the butt before he could make a run for it, only to get a nuclear warhead dropped on him by an F-4 Phantom flown by McCain.

"Hey, the messiah dies like any other person!" shouted a college student in astonishment.

"College students." groaned Josh in disgust.

McCain/Palin '08
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